There are many differences between an Au Pair and a regular Nanny. Nannies are employees who provide childcare, often with set hours and a job-first focus. An Au Pair, on the other hand, becomes part of your household, sharing meals together, joining in family routines, and supporting your children in a more personal way.
Another important difference is that while a Nanny is almost always a local hire who already has a network and community in place, Au Pairs travel from abroad.
The Au Pair program is an exchange, which means that beyond earning a stipend, participants are here to experience a new culture, improve their language skills, and connect with people. That’s why Host Families play such an important role in helping their Au Pair build connections outside the home. Doing so supports the Au Pair’s personal growth and enriches the entire cultural exchange experience for your family and even your community.
If you’re wondering how to help your Au Pair feel socially connected and engaged, keep reading. We’ll walk you through practical ways to support Au Pairs in building community outside the home, along with tips for navigating common challenges that may arise.
Why Building Community Matters for Your Au Pair
Moving to another country, even temporarily, takes a lot of courage. Most Au Pairs arrive without knowing anyone in their destination, which can make the first few weeks feel both exciting and overwhelming. This means they rely on their Host Family to point them in the right direction, introduce them to opportunities for connection, and encourage them to explore life outside the home.
Here are some primary reasons why building community is so important for Au Pairs.
Emotional Well-being
Moving abroad can be thrilling, but it can also feel lonely if the Au Pair doesn’t have people to share the experience with. Building friendships and connecting with others locally gives them an outlet beyond the Host Family, which is vital for feeling balanced and supported. Having friends to talk to, explore the area with, or just hang out with helps reduce stress and keeps their year more enjoyable and sustainable.
Cultural Exchange in Action
The heart of the Au Pair program is cultural exchange, but that exchange often goes beyond the Host Family’s home. When Au Pairs meet people in the community, they get to share their own traditions while learning new ones. These experiences can spark conversations at home, giving your children and family a wider view of the world. The more connections your Au Pair makes, the richer the exchange becomes for everyone involved.
Stronger Host Family Relationship
Spending time with people outside the Host Family helps Au Pairs feel more confident and independent, which translates into greater patience, positivity, and engagement at home. Supporting your Au Pair’s social and personal needs helps them better focus on childcare and family life, creating a healthier dynamic and stronger bonds with the entire family.
Encouraging Social Opportunities
It’s entirely normal for an Au Pair to struggle with homesickness during the first few weeks (or months) in a new country. Everything from the language to the daily routines can feel unfamiliar; without a support system, it’s easy to feel isolated.
As a Host Parent, you can help ease this transition by pointing them toward opportunities to connect, make friends, and start building a life outside the home.
Introduce Them to Local Groups and Activities
Encourage your Au Pair to get involved in local events or classes that match their interests. Community centers, libraries, and hobby groups often have activities that are free and easy to join. Language classes or cultural workshops can also be valuable in helping them learn while meeting other expats and ESL learners.
Connect Them with Other Au Pairs
At Go Au Pair we have a strong network of Local Area Representatives who organize regular meetups, giving Au Pairs a chance to connect with others nearby. We offer these gatherings to encourage Au Pairs to share their experiences, swap tips, and form friendships with peers who understand the joys and challenges of living abroad.
Help with Transportation
Transportation can be a barrier to meeting new people and exploring new places, especially for Au Pairs coming from countries where public transit is more common. Without reliable options, it’s harder for them to attend events or see friends. So, providing access to a car, teaching them how local bus or train systems work, or helping set up rideshare apps can go a long way in giving them the independence they need to build connections and feel at home in their new community.
Supporting Friendships and Independence
Helping your Au Pair build community is as much about introducing them to people and activities as it is about respecting their personal time and giving them the space to create their own experiences. Here are a few key things to consider:
Respect Their Free Time
Your Au Pair has set work hours during which they focus on childcare and family responsibilities, but outside of that, their time is their own. Respecting those hours off means letting them decide how to spend their days, whether that’s meeting friends, joining activities, or simply resting. It’s important to honor this to show appreciation for the Au Pair’s role and promote a healthier, more positive experience for everyone.
Create Space for Independence
Don’t be afraid to offer guidance and advice when needed, but give your Au Pair room to figure things out for themselves, too. Avoid micromanaging, and instead encourage them to make their own choices and explore their new environment. This freedom builds confidence and helps them adapt.
Balance Family Inclusion and Personal Exploration
Include your Au Pair in family meals or trips to make them feel welcome while also giving them the chance to pursue their own interests. This will create a balance that helps them feel part of the household without losing the independence that makes their exchange experience meaningful.
Encourage Travel and Exploration
Many Au Pairs are eager to see more of the country while they’re here. You can support this by suggesting local attractions, nearby cities, or affordable trips that are safe and practical. Even short getaways add more meaning to their experience and leave them with memories they’ll cherish long after the program ends
Fostering Cultural Exchange at Home and Beyond
Building a community for your Au Pair goes hand in hand with creating opportunities for cultural exchange. Some ways to foster this include:
Encourage Sharing Traditions
Au Pairs almost always enjoy introducing their favorite meals, holidays, or customs to their Host Families. You can support this by suggesting they cook a traditional dish for friends, share songs or games with local kids, or explain how their hometown celebrates certain holidays. This will help them feel proud of their heritage while giving other people from your community a chance to experience something new.
Build Bridges Between Families
One way to expand community is by connecting with other Host Families and their Au Pairs. For example, family dinners, playdates, or group outings let Au Pairs bond with each other while the kids benefit from a wider circle of friendships. It’s also a chance for Host Families to get to know other like-minded parents, share tips, and strengthen their own support networks.
Highlight Language Exchange
Learning a language can be an excellent tool for meeting people and building relationships. Encourage your Au Pair to take part in language swaps or casual tutoring opportunities, where they teach their native language while practicing English. This can be an enriching way to connect with peers, help others learn, and deepen their own cultural experience.
Overcoming Challenges Together
Even with the excitement of cultural exchange, adjusting to life in a new country can be hard sometimes. Our years of experience have shown that building community in and outside the home helps Au Pairs feel supported and gives Host Families tools to navigate common challenges with understanding and care.
Homesickness and Adjustment
For most Au Pairs, homesickness is part of the experience, especially in the beginning. As a Host Family, it’s important to remember this isn’t personal; it’s a natural response to being far from home. And the good news is that there are ways you can help your Au Pair ease homesickness and adjust, like encouraging them to make friends, including them in family meals, showing interest in their culture, and helping them establish regular routines.
Open Communication
Regular check-ins go a long way in preventing small issues from becoming bigger problems. Make it a habit to ask how your Au Pair is adjusting socially and encourage them to share openly about what they need. And remember: at Go Au Pair our support network is always available as an extra resource for guidance when you need it.
Lean on Local Area Representatives
One of the benefits of finding an Au Pair through Go Au Pair is that each Host Family and Au Pair is connected with a Local Area Representative who provides ongoing support. These representatives check in, host meetups, and act as a resource for both sides. Knowing there’s someone nearby to turn to makes the adjustment period smoother and gives everyone more confidence.
Build Stronger Communities With Go Au Pair!
Helping your Au Pair build a life outside the home enriches the entire exchange experience for everyone involved. Plus, when they feel socially fulfilled, children benefit from their energy and positivity, and the Host Family enjoys a stronger, more positive relationship with their Au Pair.
At Go Au Pair, we provide the tools and resources to make that possible, guiding families through every step of the journey. View Au Pair profiles today or explore our resources and start building the kind of cultural exchange that supports your Au Pair and strengthens your family.
